Mistakes

I did a bad thing last night. I yelled at my girls. I hate to yell girls. We were at the end of our last brownie meeting for the year, nothing had gone right all night and then the girls starting playing in the daycare with things they know their not suppose to and I lost it. Erin's feelings were hurt, Emily was sullen and withdrawn and I felt horrible. I know I'm hard on my girls for a reason but I don't have to be mean or overbearing. I usually try to explain the reason they are in trouble and that cause and effect are just a part of life. If you do this, then you will get in trouble but if you do this you will be rewarded with praise and responsiblity. I can't stand it when I loose control like I did. Sometimes I blame myself because I'm the adult, yet others I blame the girls because they have been taught to mind and they know what is expected of them.

Last night was just one very big mistake.

I've got four girls that are considering not staying in scouts and I can't help but wonder if I've let the troop get too big and have let these girls fall through the cracks. They seemed to love scouts but just don't know if they want to continue. I know that I take a lot of things personally but I really love doing scouts and want each girl to love it as I do. I just saw my nephew receive his Eagle Scout award and was wondering if I would how many of the girls in my troop would make it to Gold. It is so very rare that a girl will make it to Gold. Not to dismiss the Eagle Scouts but there are a lot more Eagle Scouts then there are Gold Girl Scouts in the world.